I am taking a course in linear algebra this year, and so far I have never hated any piece of math more than this subject. I am having a very hard time studying it because I only face computational problems like multiplying matrices or solving systems of equations in this course. Also, my professor finished this course in only two lectures, which is not enough time to fully understand the material. I also don't understand many concepts, such as matrices. The definition of a matrix is just a 2D array of numbers that represents a system of equations, but I don't understand how such a thing with this vague definition has properties like multiplication or addition. I mean why is the multiplication of two matrices row$*$column and not diagonal$*$column$-$row or anything else(but this is not my question)?
My question is can you recommend any sources (books) that may help me to understand this subject? I have tried reading Gilbert Strang's book and have almost finished the first chapter, but it didn't answer my questions about matrices. I have also tried to read Axler's book, but it seems too rigorous for a beginner."
