$\newcommand\ip[2]{\langle#1,#2\rangle}$For complex scalars this is very simple. If $||Tv||^2=||T^*v||^2$ it follows that $$\ip{v}{T^*Tv}=\ip{v}{TT^*v}$$for every $v$. So you only need to show that if $\ip v{Av}=0$ for all $v$ then $A=0$. This depends on the fact that we're talking about complex scalars (consider a rotation of the plane for a conterexample in $\Bbb R^2$).
The fact that $\ip{w+v}{A(w+v)}=0$ shows that $$\ip v{Aw}+\ip w{Av}=0.$$
Replacing $w$ by $iw$ shows that $$-i\ip v{Aw}+i\ip w{Av}=0.$$Hence $\ip w{Av}=0$ for all $v,w$, so $Av=0$.
Edit It's also easy in the real case. I have to confess I got a hint from those other posts; however one can get the idea from those other posts that it depends on the spectral theorem, and it's much easier than that. Say $A=T^*T-TT^*$ As above we see that $\ip v{Aw}+\ip w{Av}=0$. But now $\ip w{Av}=\ip{Av}w=\ip v{A^*w}$. So $\ip v{(A+A^*)w)}=0$, or $A+A^*=0$. Otoh it's clear that $A^*=A$. So $A=0$.