Say I consider a set theory with the Axioms of Extensionality and the Axiom of Pairing.
As I understand it, stating the axiom allows me to make a definition like
$$(a,b):=\{\{a\},\{a,b\}\}$$
and work with that $(a,b)$ in the context of my theory. Pairing says "it exists" (I can write it down with my language) and Extensionality says the abstract idea of it is unique as a set.
Is that way of thinking correct? Is that the purpose?
Because (if I know $a$ and $b$ exists and since I know what set brackets are) in a way I feel the set $\{\{a\},\{a,b\}\}$ existed already before the existence of a pair was guaranteed by the axiom - the possibility of nesting of sets as for the definition seems to be apriori to me, I asked a related question here.
Secondly, since there are more set-constructions of the ordered pair, like say
$$(a,b)':=\{b,\{a,b\}\}$$
as an alternative, I wonder:
Am I allowed to realize the ordered pair twice in one theory?
Then I could for example put ordered pairs as elements of ordered pairs of the second type and so on.
Is there really only one realization of the ordered pair in say ZFC or are there in fact all thinkable versions in the theory and we just choose one if we prove stuff about the abstract thing (which implies that the statements are true for all models)?
Or another idea: Should I view the whole thing in a way that I only define the thing using a concrete relization so that I can prove stuff about the "actual" abstract object, which is really only implicitly postulated to exist in the axiom. If that point of view ist true then I don't really see what the real difference of two realizations can be.